She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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