everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
When did angry sex become our thing?
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize