Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
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