im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
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these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
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I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
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