I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
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I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
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I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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