Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize