Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
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