SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
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