drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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