You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
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And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
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I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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