I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
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