Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize