Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize