I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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