And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
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I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
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No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Randomize