he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize