You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
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