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nut hugger
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
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