Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
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