saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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