My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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