OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
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