That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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