I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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