One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
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