oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
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He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
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