Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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