I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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