There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
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I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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