my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No subtext here. People are naked.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize