fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
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