there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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