No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
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