I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize