peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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