and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
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