And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
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