Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
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