If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
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It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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