can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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