why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
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