What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am never drinking with the goths again.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize