There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
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He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
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