I think I won the penis lottery.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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