apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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