I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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