He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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