I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize