the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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