i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
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I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
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New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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